When the Storm Comes

 This is me.

When the Storm Comes By Ullie Kaye https://www.facebook.com/share/p/

I’m Christian but not MAGA

https://www.salon.com/2024/03/29/my-challenge-as-a-christian-psychologist-help-evangelicals-see-for-he-really-is/

This article hits many of the reasons I, as a Christian, do not support Trump and was never part of the evangelical MAGA movement. He does not represent what the Bible says are the characteristics of a Godly leader but instead uses religion as a tool to advance himself and his political agenda rather than spiritual principles that glorify God. I question whether he is actually a Christian at all because there is little evidence of it in his behavior, words, and actions, but only God knows for sure. 

I was in the “anyone but Trump” camp during the 2024 election, choosing to vote for a third-party candidate instead. I previously identified politically as “Conservative Christian Republican” but if that aligns me with Trump and his current administration, then I guess I’m no longer all of that. Still a Christian, yes, but otherwise I’m politically homeless right now. 

The Danger of Stupidity

“Stupidity is a more dangerous enemy of the good than malice. One may protest against evil; it can be exposed and, if need be, prevented by use of force. Evil always carries within itself the germ of its own subversion in that it leaves behind in human beings at least a sense of unease. 

Against stupidity we are defenseless. Neither protests nor the use of force accomplish anything here; reasons fall on deaf ears; facts that contradict one’s prejudgment simply need not be believed – in such moments the stupid person even becomes critical – and when facts are irrefutable they are just pushed aside as inconsequential, as incidental. 

In all this the stupid person, in contrast to the malicious one, is utterly self satisfied and, being easily irritated, becomes dangerous by going on the attack. For that reason, greater caution is called for when dealing with a stupid person than with a malicious one. Never again will we try to persuade the stupid person with reasons, for it is senseless and dangerous.”

― Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison

Read the entire essay here: Bonhoeffer’s Theory of Stupidity

Dealing With Political Differences

I’m trying to embrace better ways to deal with political views I disagree with. Or rather, the people with whom I disagree.  This article by Dr. Robert Leahy has some practical advice that I found helpful. Fortunately, I have not been guilty of most of the tactics addressed but it serves as a reminder to not let things escalate to contentious behavior. I don’t have to compromise my opinion of our president and his administration, but neither is it my job to change someone else’s. 

How to Handle Our Political Differences by Robert L. Leahy, Ph.D:

We live in a time of intense conflict where many people experience conversations about politics. Unfortunately, we often see friendships and family relationships disintegrate very quickly. People tell me that friends have dropped them because they supported a candidate or simply because a friend was a friend of someone with a different political view. Whatever your political beliefs, it's probably true that half the people in the country disagree with you about every single central point that you hold dear. That's the nature of a democracy. How can we live with these differences without getting into fights that lead to nothing but further resentment? How can we learn to get along?

Here are some ideas to ponder—and put into practice.

1. Is what you're doing working? You may think that arguing and labeling people is going to change things, convince them, or give you a sense that you're standing up for what you believe. Yes, it's possible for you to stand up for what you believe, but it may create intense friction and put your relationships in jeopardy. You may be right, but you may not be effective. It is usually the style of your communication that creates the problem. For example, if you say, “I guess you and I may disagree about that,” there probably won’t be a problem. But if you say, “I can’t believe that you supported that person. What is wrong with you?”— then you are likely to lose a friend.

2. What is your goal? If your goal is to change people's minds, ask yourself if this has been effective. Are people saying to you, “Thank you for telling me that I'm wrong, and now I have changed my mind and I completely agree with you”? If you give up persuasion, you may find that your time with friends and family is more rewarding. What if your goal was simply to listen, state respectively that we might not agree, and then move on to something else?

3. Are you labeling people who disagree with you? Are you telling people that they are naïve, racist, homophobic, fascist, communist, authoritarian, stupid, deplorable or sexist? How do people feel when you label them? How would you feel if someone labeled you? Do they feel insulted, humiliated, despised, and marginalized? Is that what you want?

4. You can decide to disagree and accept the difference as something you can live with. There is probably no topic that everyone agrees on and you already accept differences. Why is it a problem for you that someone has a different political view? Why do you need them to agree with you? You might think, “How can I have this person as a friend if they believe this or support this candidate.” You will lose friends if you cannot accept differences. One way of thinking about a friend is to think, “I accept the whole person—even the differences.”

5. Are you reducing the entire person to a political belief? We often generalize about people—“That is the kind of person that you are.” But imagine if you accepted that people have different beliefs about politics, religion, conventions, and sports teams. We can live with these differences. What are the things that you have valued in the past in this relationship? If a family member disagrees with you, does this cancel out everything about them? Should people cancel you out because you have a different point of view? People are more than one set of beliefs. Embrace complexity—even contradiction—and then you live in the real world. As Walt Whitman once said, "Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself, (I am large, I contain multitudes.)"

6. Think about learning about others rather than changing them. As a psychologist I am curious about why people believe a lot of things. Why are some people superstitious, why are others taking too many risks, and why do some people view life in a depressing way? What if you thought of yourself as an anthropologist and you wanted to learn more about why some people have views that differ from yours? Why are some people in favor of immigration while others fear it? Why are some people in favor of social welfare while others oppose it? Learning about people is different from judging them and marginalizing them.

7. Don’t take it personally. Sometimes we feel insulted that someone has a different view of something. But do you think that they developed this view to make you uncomfortable? Even if you think that they are misled, was it aimed at you? If you observe, suspend judgment, and accept differences, you may be able to see what you have in common and come to understand how complex these issues are. Did you develop your beliefs to make others feel worse? I doubt it. You had your reasons, your experiences, and your values. Let others have the same. It’s not about you, it’s about the complexity and differences that people experience.

8. It’s not awful that someone thinks something that you disagree with. We often respond to differences as if they are catastrophic. We may think that we cannot imagine tolerating the difference. If your friend disagrees with you on politics, what can you still do in your life independently of their beliefs? Can you still spend time together, talk about other things in your life, enjoy sharing your experiences? Or do you get hyper-focused on the difference and ignore the fact that you have a lot in common. Perhaps you can do almost everything that is important to do even if a difference exists.

9. Make room for differences. What if you thought of a person in your life as a collection of 100 qualities including their behavior, their personal qualities that you have in common with them, and their many interests. Of these 100 qualities, what if 10 are things that you don't agree on, but you decided to make room for them? You can decide to rise above the differences and focus on the other qualities. Making room for the differences doesn't mean you like them, but it means that you're big enough to include them and to accept them. Let's take living in New York City where I live. There are a lot of things that you can dislike about New York including the noise, the crowds and the expense. But if you're a New Yorker you try to make room for that and recognize that some things come with the territory. Differences of opinion come with the territory.

10. Make others feel respected and valued. What is true in a good intimate relationship is also true for all relationships. We all want to feel respected. We all want to think our friends value us. We all want to feel heard. I often counsel my patients to imagine that they are a diplomat and they can approach people with a sense of decorum and respect. We can do that by avoiding personal attacks—or threats. We can do this by pointing out what we have in common—not just our differences. We can summarize what others say, rather than tell them they shouldn’t say it. We can be open to the idea that we are not always right, but that we are willing to extend to others the same courtesy and consideration that we would want for ourselves.

Keeping our relationships requires work, flexibility, humility, acceptance and openness to differences. We are not clones of one another. I value all my friends across the political spectrum and care enough about them to know that our differences will not cancel our commonality. After all, that is what friends and family are all about.

31 Days of Praying Over Political Unrest and Corruption

My heart is heavy every day as I watch our current administration lead with arrogance, retaliation, and lack of Godly character. I’ve started praying through 31 Days of Praying Over Political Unrest and Corruption: Seeking God’s Justice, Wisdom, and Peace (at aspireinhope.com) as a way to focus on the sovereignty of God over human leaders and seek His intervention in their lives. My prayer is that He would bring them to humbleness and a saving knowledge of Jesus. 

Mostly, I want the Lord to be glorified instead of a fake political messiah. I truly want Trump to come to the Lord and lead with Biblical integrity and wisdom instead of vindictiveness and pride; to lead according to Micah 6:8 - “He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

From the Aspire in Hope blog author: 

“As you complete these 31 days of prayer over political unrest and corruption, remember that God is sovereign over all nations, and His justice and righteousness will prevail. While we may see turmoil and injustice in the world, we can trust that God’s plan is unfolding and that He hears our prayers for peace, truth, and integrity. Continue to lift up leaders, governments, and nations to the Lord, trusting that He is working all things for His glory.

May these prayers continue to guide you as you seek God’s wisdom and justice in times of political unrest, and may you find peace in knowing that He is in control.”

Here are the first 10 days of prayer. Click the link above for the rest.

• Day 1: Praying for God’s Sovereignty Over Political Leaders
  Heavenly Father, I acknowledge that You are sovereign over all nations and rulers. I pray that You would guide the hearts of political leaders and establish Your will in the governance of our nation. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Proverbs 21:1)
• Day 2: Praying for Wisdom in Leadership
  Heavenly Father, I lift up those in positions of leadership and authority. Grant them wisdom to lead with integrity, fairness, and righteousness. May they seek Your guidance in their decisions. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (James 1:5)
• Day 3: Praying for Justice to Prevail
  Heavenly Father, I ask that justice would prevail in the midst of political unrest and corruption. Expose the darkness, and let Your truth and righteousness shine in places of power. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Isaiah 1:17)
• Day 4: Praying for Peace Amid Unrest
  Heavenly Father, I pray for peace in regions facing political unrest. Calm the hearts of those affected, and bring about unity and reconciliation among the people. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Philippians 4:7)
• Day 5: Praying for Corruption to Be Exposed
  Heavenly Father, I ask that You expose the corruption that plagues governments and leadership. Bring light to the darkness, and remove those who misuse their power for selfish gain. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Luke 8:17)
• Day 6: Praying for Protection of the Vulnerable
  Heavenly Father, I lift up the vulnerable populations who are most affected by political unrest and corruption. Protect them from harm, and provide for their needs as they face uncertainty. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Psalm 82:3-4)
• Day 7: Praying for Integrity in Leadership
  Heavenly Father, I pray that leaders in government would act with integrity and humility. Remove any corruption or dishonesty from their hearts, and replace it with a desire to serve the people with honor. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Proverbs 10:9)
• Day 8: Praying for Unity Among People
  Heavenly Father, I pray for unity among the people in our nation, despite political differences. Help us to work together for the common good, and let peace reign in our communities. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Ephesians 4:3)
• Day 9: Praying for Freedom from Oppression
  Heavenly Father, I ask for freedom for those who are oppressed by corrupt governments and unjust systems. Break the chains of injustice, and bring liberation to those who are suffering. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (Psalm 9:9)
• Day 10: Praying for Truth to Be Upheld
  Heavenly Father, I pray that truth would be upheld in government and politics. Let falsehoods and lies be exposed, and may those in leadership commit to truth and transparency. In the name of Jesus, Amen. (John 8:32)

Words Matter

 Being careful of my words is probably my biggest challenge, whether spoken or written. I often speak before considering the impact of my words. I have an opinion about everything but am learning that just because something can be said doesn’t mean it should. 

As I continue to read Everyday Gospel: A Daily Devotional Connecting Scripture to All of Life by Paul David Tripp, the June 9 reading based on Proverbs 10 and 11 spoke to me:

“Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.” -Ephesians 4:28

“He who guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from distress.” - Proverbs 21:23

When God Doesn’t Make Sense

 I’m reading Everyday Gospel: A Daily Devotional Connecting Scripture to All of Life by Paul Tripp this year. This excerpt from January 9 resonated with me, especially after the outcome of the election. I do not trust Trump, but I can trust the Lord. I can rest in the knowledge that He is in control and whatever He allows is for His greater purpose. Everything the Lord does is worthy of my trust so I can be at peace that no man can do anything outside of God’s ultimate will and plan even if I don’t understand how it plays out at the time. 

Christianity and the Election

“None of the candidates are Jesus. No matter who wins, Jesus is still Lord.”

Good, positive article about Christianity and the election: https://www.patheos.com/blogs/leadershiponfire/2024/08/eight-christian-thoughts-for-election-season/

The important points:

The massive political divide does not represent the average Christian.

None of the candidates are Jesus.

No matter who wins, Jesus is still Lord. 

No matter who wins, it’s not the end of the world. 

Christians don’t need favorable conditions to be believers. 

Christian values don’t change or rely on a political party. 

Regardless of what is going on, we are called to be believers. 

Do not be afraid.

“The outcome of this election does not have to determine the morality we, as Christians, embrace for ourselves. It’s just as important who we are today as who we will be on November 5, November 6, and beyond. Scripture never tells us to embrace a political worldview, but to offer the world the hope of for a better world. We can proclaim the Kingdom of God in virtue, value, and rule right now, regardless of who is in office. Let’s remember where our true citizenship lies.”

This article also was encouraging with a Biblical focus on how to pray for our country: https://www.christianity.com/wiki/prayer/how-should-we-pray-for-our-country-and-the-upcoming-election.html

Seven Things Christians Need to Remember About Politics

This author articulates so well my own thoughts in this political season:

Seven Things Christians Need to Remember About Politics by Bryan Roberts

“Political discourse is the Las Vegas of Christianity—the environment in which our sin is excused. Hate is winked at, fear is perpetuated and strife is applauded. …

“Not only are believers excused for their political indiscretions, but they are often applauded for committing them. Slander is explained away as righteous anger; winning arguments are esteemed higher than truthful ones (whether or not the “facts” align); and those who stir up dissension are given the pulpit. So I balk when pastors tell me the Church should engage in the political process. Why would we do that? The political process is dirty and broken and far from Jesus. Paranoia and vitriol are hardly attractive accessories for the bride of Christ.

“Rather than engage in the political process, Christians have a duty to elevate it. Like any other sin, we are called to stand above the partisan dissension and demonstrate a better way. Should we have an opinion? Yes. Should we care about our country? Yes. Should we vote? Yes. But it’s time we talk politics in a way that models the teachings of Jesus rather than mocks them.

Here are seven things to remember about politics:

1. Both political parties go to church

There’s a Christian Left and, perhaps even less well-known, there’s a secular Right. Despite your point of view of who is on the other side, party lines are drawn in chalk, and they’re not hard to cross. The Church must be engaged in politics, but it must not be defined by the arbitrary lines in politics.

2. Political talk radio and cable “news” only want ratings

When media personalities tell you they are on a moral crusade, they are lying to you. These personalities get rich by instilling fear and paranoia in their listeners. If we give our favorite political ideologues more time than we give Jesus, we are following the wrong master. There are unbiased, logical and accurate news sources out there. But it’s up to you to be a good steward of information—to fact-check for yourself, take ideology with a grain of salt and make decisions based on facts rather than gossip.

3. Those who argue over politics don’t love their country more than others

They just love to argue more than others. Strife and quarreling are symptoms of weak faith (Proverbs 10:12; 2 Timothy 2:23-25; James 4:1) and are among the things the Lord “detests.” We need to rise above the vitriol and learn to love our neighbors the way God commanded us. We need to love our atheist neighbor who wants to keep creationism out of schools; our Democrat neighbor who wants to keep gay marriage and abortion legal; our Republican neighbor who celebrates death penalty statistics and gun ownership; and yes, even the presidential candidate from the other side.

4. Thinking your party’s platform is unflawed is a mistake

The social policies of your party were constructed by imperfect politicians fueled by ambition. It’s nearsighted to canonize them—and it will make you obsolete in a few years. Every four years, the parties adopt a current, updated platform at their respective conventions. And while they stay on general tracks, every four years the platform evolves to meet the needs of a growing, modernized and changing party. The Republican party of today doesn’t look like it did 10 or 20 years ago. We need to know when to change our views to meet a changing culture—and when to stand by them.

5. Scripture tells us to pray for our governing leaders (2 Timothy 2:1-4) and to respect those in authority (Romans 13:1-7)

Translation: if you’re mocking your governing leaders on social media, the Holy Spirit is grieved. We should spend more time honoring our leaders and less time vilifying them. This doesn’t mean praying the President will be impeached; it doesn’t mean praying your candidate will win. God commands us to pray for our leaders—for their wisdom, for their hearts and for them to be led by Him.

6. Don’t be paranoid

The country is not going to be destroyed if your candidate loses. As 2 Timothy 1:7 says, “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” Stand up and demonstrate what God has given you. America has functioned—albeit, at varying levels of success—for years under the direction of alternating Democrat and Republican control, and at every flip, the other side thought it was the end of the world. It’s not. And if we’re a Church that believes God is in control, we have to believe that He is the one in control of the end times—not whoever’s in office now, and not whoever succeeds them.

7. Stop saying, “This is the most important election in the history of our nation”

It’s not. The most important election in the history of our nation was when Abraham Lincoln was elected president. Before that, we thought it was OK to own people. Every generation thinks it’s living in the most important moment in history. We’re not, our parents were not and our children probably won’t be. And that’s OK.

My addition to the article:

- “Political solutions belong to political problems.  Spiritual problems need a more reliable Messiah.  If we let Jesus Christ—and the peace He alone brings—be the lens through which we view the major political ideas of our day, we will stop looking for lesser messiahs in the form of our elected officials.” - Barbara Shafer

- No candidate is a messiah who will save us. When we elevate one candidate or political party as the only “godly” choice, we can be tempted into making anyone who disagrees an enemy. 

- God is not Republican or Democrat or of any other political affiliation. 

- “Put not your trust in princes, in a son of man, in whom there is no salvation. When his breath departs, he returns to the earth; on that very day his plans perish. Blessed is he whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in the LORD his God.” Psalm 146:3–5

Characteristics of a Godly Leader

If a candidate professes to be a Christian, is he held to a higher standard than those who don’t? I think so. No one expects perfection but there should at least be evidence in how he conducts himself especially if the candidate’s claim of faith is part of the platform he runs on. Character, integrity, and morality matter, both public and personal. Speaking truth instead of knowingly spreading false claims that fit the narrative he wants to believe also matters. Seeking a peaceful solution rather than inciting strife or violence definitely matters. 

This article by Brent Rinehart outlines what the Bible says are qualities to be considered from Proverbs 16:

A good leader seeks God’s direction.

Is there anything more important in a leader than he or she seeking God’s direction? Proverbs 16:1 says “The plans of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.” Verse 3 adds, “Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” And verse 9, “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” A good leader seeks the Lord, commits his way to the Lord, and the Lord establishes the next steps.

A good leader is modest, not arrogant.

We’ve all encountered the know-it-all leader, the “submit-or-else” type of leader. But Proverbs 16:5 says, “Everyone who is arrogant in heart is an abomination to the Lord; be assured, he will not go unpunished.” I don’t know about you, but I definitely don’t want to be referred to as an abomination to the Lord. That’s some pretty scary stuff.

A good leader is a peacemaker.

Proverbs 16:7 says “When a man's ways please the Lord, he makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.” Yet so many leaders aren’t interested in examining an opposing viewpoint or other ideas. We’ve lost the ability to empathize with others, and compromise has become a bad word. There’s something to be said of sticking to principles. I believe God calls us to be steadfast. He doesn’t however, call us to be jerks. And, when our “boldness” is interpreted as “coldness,” we are not doing it right.

A good leader is fair and just.

“Better is a little with righteousness than great revenues with injustice” (Proverbs 16:8). I believe in goals, and working hard to achieve them. But, the end always justifying the means is simply not true. A good leader is more interested in doing things the right way.

A good leader surrounds himself or herself with honest, trustworthy counselors … and then listens to them.

“Righteous lips are the delight of a king, and he loves him who speaks what is right” (Proverbs 16:13). Do you know leaders who surround themselves with “yes” people? Personal insecurity drives them to seek only positive reinforcement for every decision they make. A smart leader surrounds himself or herself with smarter people, who are willing to speak their minds and offer sound counsel. After all, “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed” (Proverbs 15:22).

A good leader is a good learner.

Proverbs 16:16 says, “How much better to get wisdom than gold! To get understanding is to be chosen rather than silver.” A good leader should always be learning, growing and improving. The day you feel there is nothing left to learn is the day that pride and arrogance have taken root. And, we’ve already discussed how the Lord feels about arrogance.

A good leader is humble.

We’ve seen countless prominent examples of Proverbs 16:18: “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” From politicians and celebrities to CEOs and pastors, many have grabbed headlines as their empires have fallen. In most of these cases, it’s pride that has crept in. They thought themselves invincible, but quickly found out that no one is. “It is better to be of a lowly spirit with the poor than to divide the spoil with the proud” (Proverbs 16:19).

A good leader is sensible and kind.

“Good sense is a fountain of life to him who has it, but the instruction of fools is folly. The heart of the wise makes his speech judicious and adds persuasiveness to his lips” (Proverbs 16:22-23). Being smart and sensible makes a good leader more persuasive and effective. A good leader uses “gracious words” (verse 24), not speech that is “like a scorching fire” (verse 27).

A good leader is slow to anger.

We’ve all seen the caricatures in movies and television of the angry boss; the person who yells for no reason, barks orders and berates and demoralizes the staff. Perhaps you’ve even worked for such a person. The Bible says that “Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.” (Proverbs 16:32)

As you read through these qualities of a good leader, hopefully you find them as challenging as I do. God tells us how to be effective, godly leaders. It’s up to us to put our human tendencies aside and embrace these principles. It’s also up to us to pray for those under which we serve, that they too would be the good leaders God wants them to be.

Let it Go

“You will find it necessary to let things go; simply for the reason they are heavy.” - C. Joybell C.

My journey to a simpler life is more than just decluttering the material things in my home, as freeing as that is. Those boxes donated to Goodwill are heavy, packed with many smaller things no longer wanted. But I also find myself examining what might be cluttering my life physically (health), emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually. It isn’t always one big thing but can be a lot of seemingly little things that together feel like one cumulative burden.

As silly as it sounds, when I’m dealing with such things I sometimes find myself humming “Let it Go” from the Disney movie “Frozen”. (Ok, I often bring up the Pentatonix version and sing along but no one wants to hear that!) It lightens my mood as a reminder that it’s ok to just let go of whatever worry or angst is crowding my life. 

Of course I pray a lot too, surrendering to Jesus those people, thoughts and burdens that weigh me down in mind and spirit, knowing He wants to carry them for me (1Peter 5:7, Psalm 55:22) and help me see what I need to release.

The thing about letting heavy things go is that so many are out of my control and beyond my ability to change them so I need to quit dragging them around. They aren’t mine to carry. Things like the behavior, choices, or opinions of others. No matter how much I disagree and as long as it isn’t bringing harm to themselves or others in away that would require intervention, I need to not dwell on it or let it take up emotional space. It’s difficult to do when it involves a friend or loved one but I’m not discarding the relationship, just the angst.

I also need to let go of resisting change or holding on to seasons of life that have passed. I think of a quote by Ellen Goodman: “There's a trick to the Graceful Exit. It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, a relationship is over - and to let go. It means leaving what's over without denying its value.” I like the last part of that…leaving what’s over without denying its value. It’s ok to put aside what’s over to make room for what’s next. 

As I let go of what is no longer wanted or has become too heavy, I focus instead on clinging to what is good (Romans 12:9) and “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)  Those are the things worth keeping.

Letters Unsent

One thing I’ve learned is just because something can be said doesn’t mean it needs to be said, especially when it’s likely that no good will come of it so silence is the better course. 

So the question is, how do I deal with the emotional overflow of words unsaid, of feelings unexpressed toward a person or situation? I have found therapeutic release in writing letters to the people I want to speak to but can’t. It helps to put into words the unedited thoughts without a filter, writing out the storm of emotions. 

When the words are negative or just me venting, I shred the paper afterwards. They were for my benefit only, letters unsent that validated my words and feelings without judgement from anyone, thereby unloading the weight of them. Nothing would be gained by sharing. 

The more difficult letters are to people who have caused hurt, letting them know I forgive them. The words are unsent because those who are responsible either refuse to acknowledge they did anything wrong or they have died, leaving no opportunity for resolution. Writing it down gives voice to the hurt and helps me forgive and move on. 

Sometimes my letters unsent are positive and kept in my journal. The most recent was to one of my best friends lost to cancer a few months ago. She knew how much I valued our friendship as we often expressed it to each other in phone conversations and sweet notes in the mail but it helped to write her a good-bye love letter saying it again even though she will never read it. I’ll see her again someday so that lessens the pain of grief a bit but the loss is still pretty raw. She was my kindred spirit and I miss her every single day.

I often write letters to myself as a path to objectivity and affirmation, confirming what I did right or seeing where I was wrong and how I can correct my course. Some are kept in my journal as a good reminder while others are relegated to the wastebasket having served their purpose. 

Prayer helps as I speak of what’s on my heart to God, but I often write them as letters because I express my thoughts better with pen to paper than speaking them. Those are also in a journal and I sometimes read them back to the Lord when the same matter of the heart arises again. 

Donald Trump has received a few as the election approaches, expressing my disappointment in the kind of man he has shown himself to be and why I won’t vote for him again. Obviously letters unsent and destined for the shredder but I felt better getting the angst out on paper knowing he and probably everyone else couldn’t care less what I think. 

Certainly there are situations where words are better spoken in person but when it isn’t, letters unsent provide a healthy way to acknowledge my thoughts and feelings.

 

What’s on Your Altar?

"Everybody has an altar. And every altar has a throne. So how do you know where and what you worship? It’s easy. You simply follow the trail of your time, your affection, your energy, your money, and your loyalty. At the end of that trail you’ll find a throne; and whatever, or whomever, is on that throne is what’s of highest value to you. On that throne is what you worship."   - Louie Giglio

What’s on your altar? It can be relationships, a job/career, or service to others. A hobby or travel to beautiful places can be great for mental health. Bible study, ministry, and intercessory prayer are definitely worthy of space. Even material collections that bring us joy might show up on the altar. 

But what about the throne? Any thing or person that becomes an obsession or a singular focus of our money, time, affection, loyalty, and energy threatens to take over the throne of our lives. It could be the pursuit of wealth or status above all else. Or the pursuit of youth and beauty. Maybe social media consumes our time and energy. Any number of addictions might battle for prominence. 

For some a presidential candidate sits on the throne as an object of messiah-like worship. Sadly, I have witnessed this a lot the past few years and more-so lately. 

I hope Jesus is on the throne of my altar. I think He mostly is, but it’s a battle with the many other things vying for a place as well. 

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” - Matthew 6:21

Scarlet Letters

Nathaniel Hawthorne’s “The Scarlet Letter” tells the story of Hester Prynne, a Puritan woman caught in adultery and forced to wear the letter “A” on her chest to expose her sin and shame. Public shame for sin is politically incorrect these days and that’s a topic I’d like to explore in another post sometime. But today this story has me thinking about the other side of wearing a “scarlet letter”; the misuse of it as we define ourselves or others by something long after amends have been made and forgiveness granted.

I’m reminded of another story in scripture when a woman found in the act of adultery was brought before Jesus. Here’s how it played out as recorded in John 8:

The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman caught in adultery, and having set her in the center of the court, they said to Him, "Teacher, this woman has been caught in adultery, in the very act. "Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women; what then do You say?" They were saying this, testing Him, so that they might have grounds for accusing Him. But Jesus stooped down and with His finger wrote on the ground. But when they persisted in asking Him, He straightened up, and said to them, "He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." Again He stooped down and wrote on the ground. When they heard it, they began to go out one by one, beginning with the older ones, and He was left alone, and the woman, where she was, in the center of the court. (v. 3-9)

I sometimes wonder if the woman was set up for the purpose of trapping Jesus. If Jesus said, "Let her go," then it would seem that he is breaking the Mosaic law. If he said, "Execute her for the crime of adultery," then Jesus would seem harsh and would break Roman law, because the Romans had taken away the right of Jews to officially execute people for religious offenses. But the fact is, she was guilty. Whether it was a set up or not, she was caught in the act of adultery and law was clear about the punishment. On a side note, I wonder what Jesus wrote in the ground…maybe the names of the accusers in the group who at one time or another had committed adultery with this same woman? Or perhaps he listed the sins they were guilty of themselves. We aren’t told but whatever it was it seems to have influenced the outcome.

Jesus never denied the woman sinned. He never denied the penalty the law required or the Pharisees’ right to carry out the judgment. What he did was force the accusers to acknowledge that they themselves were sinners. In Jewish law, witnesses to a capital offense were the ones who began the stoning. One commentator suggests that when Jesus said, “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her,” he was really saying "all right, let’s execute her. But let’s do it right. One of the witnesses has to have a hand in her execution. So who among you is the one who witnessed this crime, but only brought to me the woman, not the man?" Perhaps, caught in the trap themselves, the men left rather than expose their own guilt.

If the story ended there it would still be a good lesson for us. But for me, the beauty is what followed:

Straightening up, Jesus said to her, "Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?" She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said, "I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on sin no more." (v.10-11)

We aren’t told in this account who the woman was or what happened after that but I have to imagine that after such mercy and forgiveness that she changed her ways. I can also imagine that it wasn’t easy because like Hester Prynne, she was likely defined by her past even if she never committed adultery again. The accusers were likely still pointing at her, gossiping about her; still trying to put the focus on her so that their own sins would not be found out. She likely had her own moments of self-condemnation.

These stories happen to be about adultery but that isn’t the point. What is on my mind today is how we let any sin define us long after we’ve confessed and received forgiveness from Jesus. Sometimes we allow another to keep putting a scarlet letter on our chests without justification. Sometimes we wake up every morning and pin it on ourselves out of shame for something we did years ago or even something that was done to us that we have no reason to feel guilty about. Mostly though, we have an enemy, Satan, who continually whispers in our ear each letter that represents why we are guilty, beyond forgiveness, beyond the reach of mercy and grace of the Saviour, beyond redemption, beyond hope. His greatest weapon against us is accusation to cause doubt in what Jesus did on the cross.

What are some of the scarlet letters you carry around? I have my own collection that I drag out every now and then in my moments of doubt but then I choose to lay them at Jesus’ feet. In the shadow of the cross scarlet letters lose their power. Like the woman brought before him, if we just look through the filter of redemption we will find our accusers, or rather THE accuser, have left empty-handed with no evidence against us. 

Romans 8:1 says there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. He promises forgiveness when we confess wrong doing (1 John 1:9) and not only forgiveness but that the sin is removed and forgotten (Psalm 103:12). Those are powerful promises that make the scarlet letters fall away as Jesus whispers in our ear, "neither do I condemn you."

(reposted from 2010)